Set it & Forget it

1. Insomnia is driven by attention and problem-solving attempts

Attention is oxygen to insomnia, something it cannot survive without.

The paradox of insomnia lies in the fact that trying to solve it perpetuates the problem. When we focus on sleep, worry about not sleeping, or attempt various remedies, we inadvertently feed the cycle of sleeplessness. This attention creates anxiety and hyperarousal, making it harder to fall asleep naturally.

The solution is counterintuitive:

• Shift attention away from sleep
• Stop trying to "fix" sleep issues
• Engage in enjoyable activities unrelated to sleep
• Accept that some nights may involve less sleep

By reducing the importance placed on sleep, we allow our natural sleep mechanisms to function without interference.

2. Sleep is controlled by two factors: sleep drive and hyperarousal

Sleep is not complicated. There are only two factors that determine how well you sleep, the gas and the brake.

The sleep system is simple, governed by two primary factors:

1. Sleep drive (the gas):

   • Builds up naturally during wakefulness
   • The longer you're awake, the stronger it becomes
   • Cannot be artificially increased

2. Hyperarousal (the brake):

   • Any form of heightened alertness or anxiety
   • Can block sleep even when sleep drive is high
   • Often fueled by worry about sleep itself

Understanding this model helps demystify sleep issues and focuses efforts on reducing hyperarousal rather than trying to artificially increase sleep drive through ineffective means.

3. The 3 P model explains how insomnia develops and persists

Predisposition, precipitating event, and perpetuating factors - these three P's explain how you ended up in a place of little sleep and lots of worries.

The 3 P model provides a framework for understanding the development of chronic insomnia:

1. Predisposition:

   • Personality traits (e.g., perfectionism, tendency to worry)
   • Ability to focus attention intensely

2. Precipitating event:

   • Stressful life event or change
   • Initial bout of sleeplessness (normal response to stress)

3. Perpetuating factors:

   • Worry about sleep loss
   • Attempts to "fix" sleep problems
   • Behavioral changes that maintain insomnia

By recognizing these factors, individuals can address the root causes of their insomnia and break the cycle of perpetuation.

4. Set it & Forget it: Spend less time in bed and shift attention away from sleep

Do things you enjoy that keep your thoughts away from sleep.

The Set it & Forget it approach is a two-pronged strategy for overcoming insomnia:

1. Set it:

   • Establish a consistent wake-up time
   • Limit time in bed to build sleep drive
   • Create a sleep window based on current sleep patterns

2. Forget it:

   • Engage in enjoyable activities during the day
   • Avoid focusing on sleep or sleep-related activities
   • Replace sleep efforts with non-sleep-related pursuits

This approach helps rebuild natural sleep patterns and reduces the anxiety and hyperarousal that fuel insomnia.

5. Sleep confidence is crucial for overcoming insomnia

Sleeping better is a positive in itself, a breeze nudging you forward. Your strong positive reaction is the gush of air that will carry you miles closer to that place of peaceful sleep for the rest of your life.

Building sleep confidence is a key factor in overcoming insomnia. It involves:

• Recognizing and celebrating small improvements in sleep
• Shifting focus from sleep quantity to overall well-being
• Trusting in your body's natural ability to sleep

As sleep confidence grows, anxiety about sleep diminishes, creating a positive feedback loop that promotes better sleep. This process can be accelerated by:

• Positive affirmations about sleep
• Sharing sleep successes with others
• Reframing setbacks as opportunities for growth

6. Medications and sleep aids can erode sleep confidence

Alexa's already shaky sleep confidence now starts to completely erode.

The pitfalls of sleep aids stem from their impact on sleep confidence:

1. Short-term effects:

   • May provide temporary relief
   • Create belief that sleep is dependent on external factors

2. Long-term consequences:

   • Erode trust in natural sleep ability
   • Lead to dependency and increased anxiety when ineffective

3. Alternative approach:

   • Focus on building natural sleep confidence
   • If using medications, maintain consistent usage to neutralize their perceived impact

By reducing reliance on sleep aids, individuals can rebuild trust in their innate ability to sleep well.

7. Worry and anxiety fuel insomnia, but can be overcome

I stopped worrying is consistently the most common answer you get from someone that no longer has trouble sleeping.

Overcoming worry about sleep is crucial for resolving insomnia. This can be achieved through:

1. Education:

   • Understanding the nature of sleep and insomnia
   • Recognizing that short-term sleep loss is not harmful

2. Changing behaviors:

   • Reducing time spent in bed when not sleeping
   • Engaging in enjoyable activities unrelated to sleep

3. Shifting focus:

   • Redirecting attention from sleep to daytime well-being
   • Cultivating a mindset of acceptance rather than struggle

By addressing the root causes of worry and anxiety, individuals can break the cycle of insomnia and regain natural sleep patterns.

8. Short-term sleep loss is normal and not harmful

Sleeping less in times of stress is completely normal and expected.

Understanding normal sleep variations helps reduce anxiety about sleep:

• Short-term sleep loss is a natural response to stress
• The body can function on less sleep temporarily
• No evidence links short-term insomnia to health problems

Key points to remember:

1. Most people overestimate their sleep needs
2. Objective sleep measurements often differ from subjective experiences
3. Focusing on daytime functioning rather than sleep quantity is more productive

By accepting that some sleep variation is normal, individuals can reduce the anxiety that often perpetuates insomnia.

9. Setbacks are opportunities for growth in sleep confidence

When you have a setback and you don't change a thing, if you just keep doing exactly what you were doing when you were sleeping better, that's when the magic happens.

Reframing setbacks as opportunities for growth can accelerate progress in overcoming insomnia:

1. Recognize progress:

   • Acknowledge that setbacks indicate prior improvement
   • Celebrate the new baseline from which you can improve

2. Maintain consistency:

   • Resist the urge to change strategies during setbacks
   • Continue with established routines and behaviors

3. Use setbacks to build resilience:

   • Prove to yourself that you can function well even with less sleep
   • Strengthen belief in your ability to overcome sleep challenges

By viewing setbacks as part of the process rather than failures, individuals can maintain momentum and continue building sleep confidence.

10. Behavioral activation and positive affirmations promote better sleep

Behavioral activation is the technical term for doing stuff you enjoy.

Engaging in enjoyable activities and practicing positive affirmations can significantly improve sleep:

1. Behavioral activation:

   • Shifts focus away from sleep-related worries
   • Reduces overall anxiety and stress
   • Promotes natural tiredness and improved sleep drive

2. Positive affirmations:

   • Reinforce belief in ability to sleep well
   • Counter negative self-talk about sleep
   • Build sleep confidence over time

Examples of effective strategies:

• Pursuing hobbies or interests unrelated to sleep
• Spending time with friends or family
• Engaging in physical activities for enjoyment rather than sleep improvement
• Regularly stating and writing positive affirmations about sleep ability

By incorporating these practices into daily life, individuals can create a positive cycle that supports better sleep and overall well-being.

Last updated: January 22, 2025