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The Lifegiving Home

The Lifegiving Home

Creating a Place of Belonging and Becoming
by Sally Clarkson 2016 248 pages
4.23
6k+ ratings
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Key Takeaways

1. Home is a Lifegiving Legacy Built with Intention

As I walked its halls, I learned more and found my soul awakening, my imagination rekindling as I pondered my own dream of creating a lifegiving home, a legacy that would speak into generations to come.

Intentionality matters. Creating a lifegiving home doesn't happen by accident; it requires a clear vision and deliberate effort. Just as an architect needs a blueprint, homemakers need a plan to cultivate beauty, love, and inspiration within their living spaces. This involves consciously designing the atmosphere, traditions, and celebrations that will nourish the hearts, minds, and souls of those within its walls.

Home as a haven. A lifegiving home serves as a sanctuary for all who enter, offering refuge from the stresses and demands of the outside world. It's a place where individuals can feel safe, accepted, and loved, allowing them to recharge, reconnect, and rediscover their sense of belonging. This involves creating an environment that fosters rest, relaxation, and emotional well-being.

Legacy of love. The ultimate goal is to create a lasting legacy in the form of a home that gives life to others, reflecting the values and traditions that are most cherished. This involves intentionally passing down faith, love, and wisdom from one generation to the next, ensuring that the home becomes a source of strength, inspiration, and guidance for years to come.

2. Homesickness is a Holy Desire for Belonging

The ache for home lives in all of us, the safe place where we can go as we are and not be questioned.

Longing for connection. Homesickness is more than just missing a physical place; it's a deep-seated yearning to be known, loved, and accepted for who you are. This desire for belonging is a fundamental human need, reflecting our innate desire for connection and community. It is a longing for a place where our story began, where the stories of others intertwine with ours in a history that sustains us.

Home as refuge. A true home provides a sense of refuge from the loneliness and alienation of the modern world. It's a place where individuals can escape the pressures of performance and expectation, finding solace and comfort in the familiar rhythms and relationships of daily life. It is a place where our loneliness can be comforted and we can encounter the affection of God and human alike.

Making home possible. Recognizing homesickness as a holy desire can inspire us to create spaces of belonging in our own lives. This involves intentionally cultivating relationships, creating welcoming environments, and embracing the beauty of the everyday, transforming ordinary spaces into havens of love and connection. It is a creative force pressing within us, a muscled hope that challenges us to take the void spaces of our lives, the empty forms of a broken world, and fill them with love, beauty, and belonging.

3. Conducting a Symphony of Grace in Your Home

Home is where the heart sings.

Atmosphere matters. Every home has an atmosphere, a unique "life music" that influences the emotions and experiences of those within its walls. The conductor of this atmosphere is responsible for intentionally shaping the environment to reflect the values, beliefs, and spirit of the household. This involves creating a space where beauty, safety, knowledge, and relationship flourish.

Elements of a lifegiving home:

  • Welcome: Creating a space where all who enter feel cherished and valued
  • Safety: Providing a haven from the destructive voices and harms of the outside world
  • Knowledge: Filling the home with resources that inspire wisdom and understanding
  • Beauty: Adorning the space with images, colors, and textures that delight the senses
  • Relationship: Fostering connection and fellowship through intentional design
  • Nourishment: Celebrating life through shared meals and meaningful conversation
  • Rest: Creating a sanctuary for souls to escape stress and find renewal

Intentionality is key. Building a lifegiving home requires intentionality, planning, and design. It's not enough to simply fill a space with furniture and belongings; the conductor must actively cultivate an atmosphere that supports vibrant, joyful, and productive living, nurturing the growth of body, soul, and spirit.

4. Rhythms of Incarnation: Making Home a Daily Practice

The world cannot be discovered by a journey of miles, no matter how long, but only by a spiritual journey, a journey of one inch, very arduous and humbling and joyful, by which we arrive at the ground at our own feet, and learn to be at home.

Reclaiming rhythms. Modern life often disrupts the natural rhythms of creation, drawing us away from connection, relationship, and physical reality. To create a lifegiving home, it's essential to reevaluate the structures and habits of our lives, reclaiming the holy, original rhythms of creativity, work, rest, and relationship.

Incarnational living. The gospel begins with God being born as a human baby, emphasizing the importance of physical place and personal relationship. Homemaking is not a retreat from the world but a profound engagement with it, a work of incarnational power and creativity. It is a restoration of what God originally intended for humankind.

Home as a story. Home is more than just a dwelling; it's a story, a narrative spun out day by day, reflecting the reality of the God whose love animates every aspect of our being. This story is molded by the walls, hours, tasks, and feasts with which we fill our time, creating a space where eternity rises up in time.

5. January: Creating a Framework for Home

Isn’t it nice to think that tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it yet?

New beginnings. January offers a fresh start, a chance to wipe the slate clean and begin anew. It's a time to reflect on the past year, identify areas for improvement, and set intentions for the future. This involves planning daily rhythms, assigning chores, simplifying commitments, and establishing meaningful rituals.

Planning for purpose. Careful planning is essential for creating a productive and flourishing home. This involves considering the needs and personalities of everyone who lives there, establishing routines for handling daily tasks, and simplifying commitments to prioritize what matters most. It is a time to enjoy some "me" time and plan how I wanted to invest in my year ahead.

Decluttering the soul. In addition to decluttering the physical space, it's important to declutter the mind and heart, releasing lingering feelings of guilt, bitterness, or resentment. This involves identifying areas for personal growth, setting spiritual goals, and pouring out all of your heart and thoughts to God.

6. February: Cultivating a Culture of Love

To love someone means to see him as God intended him.

Love as a foundation. Unconditional, generous, and intentional love is the hallmark of a lifegiving home. This involves creating an atmosphere of acceptance, forgiveness, and affirmation, where everyone feels valued and cherished. It is the powerful energy that opens hearts to be able to hear, know, and understand the love of God, to embrace His truth and His ways.

Practical expressions of love:

  • Kindness and sympathy
  • Focused attention and time invested
  • Words of affirmation and encouragement
  • Helping and serving
  • Saying "I'm sorry"
  • Gifts or cards
  • Respect and honor
  • The magic of touch

Manners matter. Good manners are rooted in treating others with respect and honor, reflecting the value we place on their worth and dignity. This involves practicing kindness, empathy, and consideration in all our interactions, creating a culture of grace and civility within the home.

7. March: Discovering Beauty in the Ordinary

Everybody needs beauty as well as bread, places to play in and pray in, where Nature may heal and cheer and give strength to body and soul alike.

Beauty in the everyday. Beauty isn't just about grand gestures or special occasions; it's about finding loveliness in the ordinary moments of daily life. This involves intentionally creating spaces and experiences that nourish the senses and uplift the spirit, transforming mundane tasks into opportunities for joy and connection.

Cultivating wonder. Wonder is a state of mind in which the sight and senses are wholly engaged in what is before them. It is the fundamental condition of education. It is a state of mind in which the sight and senses are wholly engaged in what is before them. This involves training our eyes to see the beauty of creation, cultivating a curious mind, and nurturing a sense of awe and amazement in the world around us.

The power of language. Words shape consciousness, influencing how we perceive and value the world around us. By filling our homes with rich language, inspiring stories, and beautiful art, we can cultivate a sense of wonder and appreciation for the goodness of God's creation.

8. April: Nurturing a Heritage of Faith

Keep on walking along the way. Keep on trusting Him every day.

Faith as a journey. The Christian life is a pilgrimage, a journey of faith that requires perseverance, commitment, and trust. This involves intentionally creating rhythms and practices that nurture our spiritual growth, drawing us closer to God and equipping us for the challenges ahead.

Home as a training center. Home is the ideal place to cultivate a heritage of faith, providing a safe and nurturing environment where individuals can learn, grow, and explore their relationship with God. This involves establishing daily routines of prayer, Scripture reading, and worship, as well as creating opportunities for meaningful conversations about faith and values.

Passing on the torch. Nurturing a heritage of faith involves intentionally passing down our beliefs, traditions, and values to the next generation. This involves sharing our stories, modeling our faith in action, and creating a culture of love and acceptance that draws others closer to God.

9. May: Commemorating Life's Milestones

To invite someone into your home
Is to take charge of their happiness
For as long as they are under your roof.

Marking significant moments. Commemorating life's milestones is a powerful way to honor individuals, celebrate accomplishments, and reinforce shared values. This involves creating meaningful ceremonies and traditions that acknowledge the significance of each event, reminding us of God's faithfulness and our responsibility to steward our lives well.

Home commencement. A home commencement ceremony provides an opportunity to celebrate a child's graduation and commission them to enter the adult world with faith, purpose, and integrity. This involves gathering loved ones to share memories, offer blessings, and present gifts that symbolize the values and traditions of the family.

Celebrating love and family. May is a time to celebrate mothers, weddings, and babies, affirming the importance of strong and healthy family relationships. This involves hosting showers, sharing biblical wisdom, and creating a culture of love and support that honors the sanctity of marriage and the value of children.

10. June: Prioritizing Delight and Play

It is a happy talent to know how to play.

Play is essential. Play is not frivolous; it's a vital part of human development, fostering creativity, imagination, and social skills. This involves creating opportunities for children (and adults) to engage in unstructured play, explore their interests, and develop their unique talents.

Cultivating a playful spirit. A playful spirit extends beyond childhood, infusing all aspects of life with joy, curiosity, and wonder. This involves embracing spontaneity, seeking out new experiences, and finding humor in the everyday, creating a home environment that is both stimulating and restorative.

Balancing technology. While technology can offer certain benefits, it's important to limit screen time and prioritize real-life interactions. This involves creating a home environment that encourages outdoor play, creative expression, and meaningful connections with others.

11. July: Embracing a Heroic Narrative

Nurture your mind with great thoughts; to believe in the heroic makes heroes.

Heroism in story and life. Encountering heroism in stories, history, and tradition can inspire us to live more courageously, compassionately, and purposefully. This involves filling our homes with narratives that celebrate noble deeds, sacrificial acts, and unwavering commitment to truth and justice.

Shaping identity. The stories we tell ourselves and our children shape our sense of identity, influencing the choices we make and the paths we pursue. This involves intentionally crafting a family narrative that emphasizes values such as courage, integrity, and service, empowering individuals to become heroes in their own right.

Living the story. The ultimate goal is to translate the heroic narratives we encounter into action, living out our values in tangible ways. This involves seeking opportunities to serve others, stand up for what is right, and make a positive impact on the world around us.

12. August: Shaping and Celebrating Family Culture

In every conceivable manner, the family is link to our past, bridge to our future.

Family culture matters. Every family has a unique culture, a blend of personalities, history, traditions, and values that shapes its identity and influences its members. This involves intentionally cultivating a culture that reflects our beliefs, strengthens our bonds, and provides a sense of belonging.

Creating a haven. A strong family culture provides a haven from the pressures and challenges of the outside world, offering a place of refuge, acceptance, and support. This involves creating an environment where individuals can be themselves, share their struggles, and find encouragement to persevere.

Sharing the culture. A vibrant family culture is not meant to be kept to ourselves; it's meant to be shared with others. This involves opening our homes, inviting friends and neighbors to join in our traditions, and extending our love and support to those who may be lacking a sense of belonging.

Last updated:

Review Summary

4.23 out of 5
Average of 6k+ ratings from Goodreads and Amazon.

The Lifegiving Home receives mostly positive reviews, praised for its inspiring ideas on creating a nurturing home environment. Readers appreciate the mother-daughter perspective and practical suggestions. Some find it overwhelming or idealistic, while others see it as a valuable resource for intentional homemaking. Critics note repetitiveness and marketing of other products. Overall, the book is viewed as encouraging for those seeking to make their homes places of belonging, faith, and love.

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About the Author

Sally Clarkson is a prolific author, speaker, and ministry leader focused on discipleship, motherhood, and creating a faith-centered home. She has written numerous best-selling books, including "Own Your Life" and "Desperate." Clarkson's work spans global missionary efforts, speaking engagements across multiple continents, and founding Whole Heart Ministries with her husband Clay in 1995. Her ministry has touched thousands of families worldwide, emphasizing the importance of intentional parenting and cultivating a home environment that nurtures faith and love. Clarkson's experiences and teachings draw from her extensive travel and dedication to sharing the Gospel in various cultural contexts.

Other books by Sally Clarkson

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