Happy Sexy Millionaire

1. Happiness is Now or Never: Embrace the Present Moment

Happiness – fulfilment – is an infinite game. You cannot 'win' at being happy. You can only 'be' it, and be it until the player is no longer in the game.

Happiness is not a destination. It's an ongoing experience that only ceases when you die. The pursuit of happiness through external achievements or material possessions is futile, as there is no finish line or podium in this infinite game. Instead, focus on the present moment and recognize that you are already enough.

Detach from the destination mindset. Living too much in the past or future can make you miserable. Embrace the philosophy that happiness is now or never. This doesn't mean you shouldn't have goals, but rather that you should find joy in the journey itself.

Practice gratitude. Regularly expressing gratitude has been proven to increase happiness and well-being. Keep a gratitude journal, reflect on past experiences, or use music to remind yourself of how far you've come. This practice can transform your perspective and make everything in your life feel more meaningful.

2. Reject Binary Boxes and Invalid Questions for Personal Growth

Labels are the short-cut, over-simplified descriptions we give ourselves, of ourselves. They are binary boxes that contain a series of implicit instructions on who you are and how you should behave.

Question societal norms and expectations. Resist the pressure to fit into binary boxes or answer invalid questions about your life. These oversimplified categories often lead to anxiety, stress, and chronic overthinking.

Embrace complexity and nuance. Recognize that humans are multifaceted, uniquely complex, and ever-evolving beings. Reject the notion that you must have a single passion, calling, or soulmate. Instead, allow yourself to have multiple interests and fluid relationships.

Write your own script. Don't conform to society's expectations of how your life should unfold. Create your own rules based on what is true for you and the world you're living in now. This approach allows for more authentic personal growth and fulfillment.

3. Create Your Passion: Intrinsic Motivation Trumps External Rewards

Most of us now find ourselves at war with our external and internal 'correct' answers and too often, we struggle to know which is which.

Identify your intrinsic motivations. Distinguish between your genuine interests and those imposed by external influences like social media, family expectations, or societal norms. Pursue goals that align with your authentic values and desires.

Beware of external rewards undermining intrinsic motivation. Research shows that providing incentives for activities you already enjoy can diminish your original motivation. Focus on maintaining autonomy and competence in your pursuits.

Cultivate self-determination. Develop a sense of control over your life and actions. Engage in activities that fulfill your needs for autonomy, competence, and connection. This approach leads to greater motivation and life satisfaction.

4. The Journey Back to Human: Reconnect with Nature and Relationships

We're the first humans to disband our tribes and it is making us ill.

Recognize the loneliness epidemic. Despite being more connected than ever through technology, our generation is experiencing unprecedented levels of loneliness and isolation. This disconnection from meaningful human relationships is having severe consequences on mental and physical health.

Prioritize genuine human connections. Make a conscious effort to engage in face-to-face interactions and build deep, meaningful relationships. Resist the urge to substitute digital connections for real-world experiences.

Reconnect with nature. Spend time outdoors and in natural environments. This can have a profound impact on your well-being, reducing stress and anxiety while promoting a sense of peace and belonging.

5. Quitting Framework: Know When to Change Direction

Knowing when to quit, change direction, leave a toxic situation, demand more from life or give up on something that you know in your heart isn't right and move on is a life-defining skill that people who find fulfilment, love and success – people who win at life – have intuitively mastered.

Develop a quitting framework. Use a decision-making process to evaluate when it's time to quit or change direction. Consider factors such as personal growth, alignment with values, and potential for future success.

Embrace uncertainty. Recognize that the fear of uncertainty often keeps people trapped in unfulfilling situations. Have faith in yourself and your ability to navigate new challenges.

Make decisions based on probability. When faced with difficult choices, aim for at least a 51% probability of success based on available information. This approach allows for decisive action without the paralysis of seeking perfection.

6. Consistency Compounds: Small Actions Lead to Big Results

Success is the result of your consistency invisibly compounding for or against you, over long periods of time.

Understand the power of compounding. Just as compound interest can exponentially grow your finances, consistent small actions can lead to tremendous results in all areas of life.

Focus on daily habits. Rather than seeking short bursts of intensity, prioritize consistent, sustainable actions. Small improvements compound over time, leading to significant changes.

Build your "Invisible PR." Every action and decision you make contributes to your reputation. Focus on integrity, trustworthiness, and how you treat others, as these factors will compound over time and significantly influence your life's trajectory.

7. Take Responsibility for Your Life and Emotions

Your emotional response is your fault and responsibility. If you realise that, you'll have the power to control it.

Develop an internal locus of control. Believe that you have control over your life and circumstances. This mindset leads to greater motivation, resilience, and success.

Own your emotional responses. Recognize that external events don't make you feel a certain way; your interpretation of those events does. By taking responsibility for your emotions, you gain the power to change them.

Avoid the victim mentality. Resist the urge to blame external factors for your situation. Instead, focus on what you can control and take action to improve your circumstances.

8. Build a Unique Skill Stack for Success

This means that, statistically, to become the best in your industry you do not need to become the best at any one aspect, you just need to be very good at a variety of complementary skills – skills that your industry requires for personal success.

Identify complementary skills. Rather than striving to be the best at one thing, focus on developing a unique combination of skills that work well together in your industry.

Aim for the top 10% in multiple areas. Being in the top 10% of several skills is often more valuable and achievable than being in the top 1% of a single skill.

Continuously expand your skill set. Seek out new skills that can enhance your existing abilities and set you apart in your field. This approach increases your adaptability and value in a rapidly changing world.

9. Prioritize Time as Your Most Valuable Asset

We are all gamblers, stood over the roulette table of life. The one rule of the game is that we have to place one of our chips every hour and, once a chip is placed, we will never get it back.

Visualize your finite time. Imagine your life as a sand timer, with each grain representing an hour of your life. This perspective can help you make more intentional decisions about how you spend your time.

Identify your core values. Determine what truly matters to you and align your time investments with these priorities. Be willing to say no to activities that don't serve your highest values.

Live with intention. Make conscious choices about how you spend your time, recognizing that each decision represents an irreversible investment of your most precious resource.

Last updated: January 22, 2025